


Affliction

by superhyung



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Angst, F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-22
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-07-16 12:46:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7268782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superhyung/pseuds/superhyung
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The burden he had to carry alone. The sadness that engulfed his soul. The memories that haunted him. The aching pain that he had to withstand. There's nothing else that he could do now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Affliction

It's been two years now ever since he lost her. The pain he had to endure all alone, no one able to set him free from this wretched curse. Hearing her screams constantly, seeing the pool of blood around her limp body, how can one escape from these nightmares? Sehun sat on his bed in the cold, dark room alone. Replaying the scene over and over again, he wished for her to come back. "It's all my fault." He would whisper continuously to himself. His arms wrapped around his pale legs as he would tremble from fear.

"Sehun, please don't drink too much."

"Can you drive?"

"Here, let me drive. It's more safe this way."

Her sweet, caring words replayed in his head. Oh how he wished that he'd listen to her. If he did, she would still be here. Sehun drank a little bit too much on that night. Ignoring all her words, he drove anyways with her as a passenger. Too drunk to realize, he lost control of the car and end up colliding with another vehicle. Not only losing the love of his life, but a stranger as well. With all the burden he had to carry, how can he possibly live?

The tears streamed down his cheeks, hoping and wishing to see her again. He would cry every single night and lay on his bed lifelessly. Eating a cup of ramen noodles a day and mope around his apartment. He never went outside and if someone would visit he'd just ignore them anyways. His parents call him, but he disreguards their calls. Sehun would avoid everyone and not give a damn about a single thing. But today is the day where it'll be two years since her death.

He went to her grave like he did last year on the same exact day, giving her flowers. Her favorite flowers to be exact which were lilies. He knelt down, stroking the tomb, whispering words that no one could hear. Sehun managed to hold back his tears while having a conversation with her grave as if she was still alive. "I'll make dinner tonight okay, babe?" His trembling voice cracked. The atmosphere gloomy as usual. He smiled weakly before he left, not daring to glance back or he'll lose his sanity. 

Sehun went to buy some groceries and a pack of beer. He made her favorite dish which was pasta. Setting up the table for two while smiling to himself as he sees the mouthwatering food. He lit up a couple of candles and sat down. Looking across the table only seeing an empty seat, his smile disappears. Gripping the table cloth, his emotions began to get out of hand. Laughing and crying hysterically, he slams his fists against the table. "What am I even doing?" He quietly whispered. The tears dripped down on the pasta while he clenched his teeth. The constricting pain he felt in his heart returned. Losing his sanity, he threw the plate across the room. His arms slide across the table knocking everything down. The whole room became a total mess. A total chaos. Sehun looked at his hands while he dropped to his knees. His clenched fist pressed against his chest, he felt the aching pain. Sehun laid there on the ground helplessly, closing his eyes and whimpered in the darkness. 

After an hour or so, he got a hold of himself and sat upright against the wall. His glassy eyes stared at the broken glass and scattered food across the floor. Those long, slender fingers of his ran through the floor, cutting them. The blood smeared on the tiles as he continued gliding his hand lifelessly. Sehun raised his hands and looked at the dripping blood. He dropped his hands back to the floor and leaned his head against the wall. Turning his head, he reached for the case of beer and pulled out a can. Knowing that touching the cold, aluminum surface caused him pain, he ignored it. Nothing can be more painful than losing someone who you truly loved. Sehun raised the can and cheered while smiling. Chugging the beer in one go then crushing the can and tossing it aside. 

The screams grew louder, frightening him. He glanced around the room, hearing the scream here and there. "Stop." He murmured. "Just stop... I can't take it anymore..." He grabbed another can, drowning out his fears. Slowly grabbing another can and another until there was no more. With all that effort to erase the screams from his memories, it was no use. Sehun pushed himself up, standing with shaky legs. Clumsily walking to his room with a grimace. His faltering hands couldn't manage to twist the knob to his room. Laughing at his pathetic self, his body slammed against the wooden door. Sehun pounded his fists against the door, the fury inside him took over. He blinked rapidly to stop the crying, but only more hot tears flowed down his cheeks. The pang inside that little heart reappeared, haunting his mind. Sehun turned his back towards the wall and slid down, hoping the pain would subside. His head throbbed continuously while those hands trembled from anger. The words he couldn't say to her before she left this world had escaped from his lips. "I love you." He buried his face into his palms and cried even louder. His cries echoed through the empty apartment. His body curled into a ball while he silently sobbed. Random memories flooded his mind, only causing him more pain. Sehun's hand extended into the air as if some miracle would happen. 

Her fragrance lingered throughout the apartment. Her warm touch embedded all over his body. He remembered how beautiful she was, how every single detail of her was perfect. Her long brown hair swaying back and forth. Her glossy, red, plump lips. Her rosy flushed cheeks. Her almond shaped eyes. Sehun remembered every single thing. The times where their fingers intertwined, laughing and smiling at each other, not worrying about a thing. He wished things could be the same again. He wished he could embrace her and never let go. But that's only a fantasy. Sehun snapped out from his thoughts and halted his crying. He couldn't do this anymore. He couldn't stand this life style anymore. He wanted to be with her and only her. 

This genuine love he had for her couldn't be given to another. As much as he tried, it was way too difficult to eradicate the sweet moments he shared with her. She remained forever in his memories. Forever in his heart. 

"When will things be okay?  
When will the sun rise again?  
Are all farewells like this…"

That was it. Sehun couldn't take this anymore. With his selfish thoughts, he came to the conclusion of taking away his own life in order to be with her. To be reunited with his love. He searched the apartment for a rope and dragged the chair under the fan. Sehun carefully tied the rope onto the fan, making sure it's tight and secure. He looped his head into the rope and smiled one last time. "We'll finally be together." Were his last words. He kicked the chair as his body responded from lack of air. His legs kicked back and forth while his hands gripped the rope that suffocated him. After a couple of minutes passed, Sehun's lifeless body swayed back and forth in the empty, cold, dark apartment. 

Little did you know that this was only his very own imagination. The door clicked as it swung open. "Sehun? I'm home! Do you want to eat anything?" Her warm voice rang through the dark room. She flipped the lights on only to find her boyfriend dangling from the fan. Her eyes widened with horror while she dropped the keys. She hurriedly tried to get him down, but it was useless. He was dead. She cried out her heart with Sehun in her arms. She screamed his name continuously, hugging his cold, dead body. 

Yes, it has been two years from the accident, but she never died. It was Sehun who injured his brain causing him to be insane. To hallucinate and imagine things on his own. All this time she took care of him, but he would spout out nonsense, saying that she was dead. Saying that he was the reason for her death. She would never have thought that this day would come. After all this time to convince him that she was still alive was a complete disaster. There's nothing else that she could do now. She couldn't save her beloved Sehun. This was the end.


End file.
